Barney's Beanery - Burbank

250 N. 1st St.
Burbank CA 91502
(818) 524-2912
  • PUB QUIZ—Wednesdays @ 9:00pm



Wed May 23 2018
| by Quizmaster Christopher Handschuch

People always ask, "how do you know that a team isn't cheating?"

It's a great question. One with a myriad of answers. Most of the time? There's no way of knowing unless you flat out catch them with a phone in their hand - or under the table. But - there are some exceptions.

Your Spidey sense starts to go up when a team has bombed Rounds 1 and 2 pretty miserably and suddenly begins a doubling bonanza - successfully navigating their way up the board and yet always the last ones to turn in their answers. A team might refer to something as innocuous as a catfish as a "Wels catfish" - the official name that comes up when you Google. Or you might notice that a team member continuously uses the bathroom in between every round. Even when you don't think a Quizmaster is watching - they're watching. But the truth is - I'm not usually the one you catches cheaters. No, no. I may impose the rule at the beginning and warn people against disqualification and public shaming but let's be real - I can't be everywhere at once. No, no. It is you - lovely intelligent trivia player - who is the real hero.

You leave work, come home for a scant few minutes to freshen up, and then drive off to find a parking spot and a booth that can house you and all your friends for a two hour night of trivia in the middle of your week. You're here for fun, the competition, and the cheap beer. One of your teammates even follows along with the scores of other teams so you can best determine your place in the game and how important a double would be for your standing. You're the one who detects the cheaters right away. The team that skyrockets in points, the team sitting near you that keeps glancing under the table, the team that looks like they're way too plastered to be able to find any connections anywhere. You're the eyes and ears. You see something, you say something.

So, to answer the question I'm always asked: "how do you know when a team is cheating?"

I know - because you tell me.

Game Rank Team # Team Name Score Teams Beaten Team Beat Average
1 10493 2 Camels, 1 Hump 98 11 1.000
2 10889 The Tea Lizards 90 10 0.909
3 10330 Intravenus De Milo 89 9 0.818
4 12222 Millennial Falcons 77 8 0.727
5 13553 Kitty Curiosity 74 7 0.636
6 Jeffrey Dahmer's All You Can Eat Buffet 66 6 0.545
7 The Oneders 61 5 0.455
8 Token Black 51 4 0.364
9 Barney's Bitches 48 3 0.273
10 Theres only Two Of Us! 33 2 0.182
11 Petrodamus 25 1 0.091
12 Team Know Nothings 24 0 0.000