QUIZ RECAP

When Lemertes, God Of Bold Colors, was decorating the boat belonging to Hephestes, God Of Aquatic Languishing, he thought: “I’m sick of cerulean! Every year it’s just different shades of teal and turquoise and aquamarine and I’ve had it.” So, in that moment, Lemertes went brown! In fact, turkey brown! “Hey,” said Hephestes when he saw what Lemertes was painting, “add some feathers to the top and it’ll look like a huge aquatic turkey!” And so they did, believing that the vessel would be a huge hit at that year’s Celestial Boat Show, an event for all gods who’re into boats. But upon pushing out into Cloud Harbor, Hephestes’s boat was mistaken for a giant swimming turkey and summarily shot with a giant arrow by Arronneous, God Of Arrows. “Sorry,” he later apologized, “thought it was a turkey.” Not only did Hephestes’s vessel unceremoniously sink, it was also snubbed by the judges. Here’s the point: If you wanna win the Drinking Round at King Trivia night at the Glendale Tap, learn how to do a turkey.

The Best Turkey Impression went to Tennis Club. He went full wattle with his free hand and I had to give it to him. I would’ve been hurt had I not.

In third place was The Previous Year’s Winners with 35 points. (Had they won in the previous year? No. No they had not.) In second place was Sloppy Hoppy with 40 points. (They went with the name Sloppy Hoppy after Messy Drunk didn’t go over so well.) And commanding the night with 52 points was Mount Mazama Take Your Top Off! (Note: At no time did anyone in the bar take their top off.)

Come back every Wednesday night at 7:30 for more King Trivia fun at the Glendale Tap!