QUIZ RECAP

When Periscopeus, God Of 360 Thinking, swiveled for the four hundred millionth time atop the Pole Of Highness somewhere near the Ninth Celestial Quadrant, a large neon banner of yellow, green, red and blue dropped form the freezing stars above, accompanied by a flood of black balloons (invisible against the darkness of the universe) and confetti (totally visible and easily mistaken for stars). The confetti fell to the earth (it had been cut from that new fangled weighted paper the kids were so into) and the balloons continued upward into the unknown of space. Peri (to his friends) stopped his swiveling for the first time in millennia and went agog at the display. “Agog,” he said. A recorded greeting emanated from a speaker attached to the banner by only velcro: “Congratulations, Peri! You have just completed your four hundred millionth rotation on the Pole Of Highness! How do you feel?” Peri started to respond with: “Well—“ when the voice continued on, not even waiting for an answer. “Great!” it said. “Is this a pre-recorded greeting?” asked Peri. “Yes,” the speaker responded. “But how can you be pre-recorded when you just answered my question?” asked Peri. “Can I finish?” said the speaker, who went on to explain that though Peri had done a truly great thing (rotating for a long time on his ass in the coldness of space), he wasn’t done yet. “This banner is to commemorate your halfway point! Congratulations!” “But I’m due back, I gotta go!” Peri said. “For what?” asked the speaker. “I have a lunch,” he answered. The speaker said: “Great! Here’s to another four hundred million!” And shut off. Peri called his buddy Roatatia, God Of Spinning Around, and said: “Rote (to his friends), I need a favor! How would you like to finish my swivel shift up here in space. I only got another four hundred million to go.” “I’ll be right up!” said Rote. Here’s the point: This kind of thing happened word for word at the Glendale Tap tonight. Let’s talk:

Help Us Please We’re Bleeding Oh God We’re Gonna Die! won the drinking round with a lively rendition of The Carlton from The Fresh Prince Of Bel Air. And the reason they won is because no one else wanted to play. Tense!

In third place tonight was When In Ramen with 56 points. And first and second went to a tie breaker about when Richard III died, thus making Rough Brains take second with 61 and Rob’s Angels taking first with 61 too. I love a tie breaker, as long it doesn’t also break my spirit. Come back next week for more King Trivia fun at the Glendale Tap!