QUIZ RECAP

When Pewterea, Goddess Of Mugs, said “Cheers!” to her date, Linteus, God Of Laundry, she slammed her froth-filled stein right against his and broke not only it but also his spirit. “Ow,” he said. “Did I hurt you?” she asked. “On the inside,”’he answered. Quickly, she shrunk herself small dived into his mouth to see where. “Where?” she asked him as she slid past his uvula and down farther into his throat. “Lower,” he said. At his upper ribs, she asked: “Here?” “Lower,” said Linteus. And that’s when she saw it: Linteus’s heart was in a sling from last year’s Battle Of Troy Reenactment. “A preexisting condition,” he told Pewterea. Removing the chewing gum from her mouth, she quickly applied it to the busted ventricle on the upper right of the heart. “Strawberry?” asked Lint. “Guava,” corrected Pew as she shot back up out of his throat and returned to her regular god-like size. “Now, don’t let that happen again!” Point is: Nothing like this happened at Glendale Tap tonight on King Trivia Night.

The Drinking Round was a Simpsons off, the winner was Big Fat Angry Bullies That Hate The Nerd! Great job!

In third place with 50 points was Champagne Problems (great name!). In second place with 51 points was Queen Bees and destroying the night with 62 points was Big Fat Angry Bullies That Hate The Nerd! Thanks for coming to King Trivia night at The Glendale Tap, know’m sayn’? 

QUIZ RECAP

When Discathenia, Goddess of Throwing Discs, nailed Rubeneus, God Of Camping Gear, in the face for the third time during a game of Forest Throw Down, Rube (to his friends) finally started to take it personally. “Uh, I thought we were trying to have a good time!” explained Rube whilst stanching the geyser emanating from his nose again. “Uh, I am!” said Disca (to her friends) whilst laughing high into the trees. “You gotta remember,” she explained, “hitting your nose is ten points!” “Ten?” screamed Rube. “Since when ten? I thought it was five!” A ref appeared from a bush and consulted a clipboard. “Uh, yes,” said the ref. “‘Ten points for Rube’s Shnoz, but just Rube’s.’ That’s what it says.” “Well, this is unfair!” roared Rube, whilst getting thwacked again in the nose, by yet another player. This time the thrower was Jackanius, God Of Tires. “Look, Rube,” explained Jack, “You can’t leave the game. If it weren’t for you and your nose, I wouldn’t have any points!” Without saying another word, Rube quickly fashioned a nose shield out of some bark, foliage, mud and a beaver tail. Whatever nose Rube had was now hidden under all the natural accoutrement. “Go ahead! Go for my nose again!” he challenged them. Suddenly, Rube was disc-struck from behind by another of Disca’s discs, right on his ass. Rube was irritated, but not overly so. “Whatever,” he smirked. “Uh, your ass is twenty points,” said the ref and showed Rube his clipboard as proof. Point is: There was no such disc throwing tonight at The Glendale Tap’s King Trivia Night. Let’s talk!

The Drinking Round was Sing A Love Song, Dammit. Beans On Toast took it because the guy sang in a faded echo and who does that anymore? Who does that anymore? They do! Free drinks for them!

In third place tonight was Live Laugh Love with 41 points. In second was QuizKnows with 49 points! And dominating the night with 60 points was P’s In A Pod! Do come back next week for more King Trivia fun every Wednesday at The Glendale Tap, won’t you?

QUIZ RECAP

When Hydrophenia, Goddess Of Moisture, said: "Oh, nertz," it was because she was on her last sponge. That’s not a euphemism for something untoward; she was literally down to her one remaining sponge whilst cleaning the Kraken’s jacuzzi. “You finished yet?” asked the Kraken from his massage table. “You know how clean I like it.” Hydrophenia had lost a bet with Glatticus, God Of Gambling, that she could beat him at a spoons contest. Not playing the spoons; making them. Glatticus managed to get five thousand spoons done in just under three seconds, and Hydrophenia managed only four thousand nine hundred and ninety-nine. “It was embarrassing,” said the kingdom. Like, collectively. All together, they said it in unison: “It was embarrassing.” So now, she had to clean the Kraken’s stuff. But she would get back at him by putting a newly invented acidic astringent called Horse Breath on the porcelain of the Kraken’s bidet which only goes active once all light has been cut off from it. So, any day now, the entire kingdom wouldl hear an entirely new pitch of screaming from the Kraken once he needed to take care of his more posterior areas. Point is: No such bidets were present at The Glendale Tap Wednesday night. Let’s talk.

Urethra Franklin took the drinking round with a rendition of “Chocolate Rain” that the entire bar assured me was a real song. I’m sure it is. It sounds like something Prince almost wrote.

In third place tonight was the aforementioned Urethra Franklin with 53 points. In second was Jazz Cats with 55. And destroying the room with 67 points was Macho Taco Talk!

Come back next week for more King Trivia fun at the Glendale Tap!