QUIZ RECAP

When Zevenerus, God Of Thumbtacks, lost his balance in the break room and dropped all the universe’s paper clips to the floor, the only sound heard was that of Gladerall, Goddess Of Cream, who brayed: “Uh-oh! Someone’s a klutz! Can I get you some coffee?” Her offering of warmth and caffeine had no effect on Zev for he was, unlike most Gods, on a caffeine-free diet. “You know I don’t like coffee,” he answered, “it tastes like a grownup drink.” Still, the matter of the paper clips needed immediate attention. Both Gods reckoned there were about a hundred of them spread out on the thin carpet floor and neither could remember the last time they bent down to pick up anything. “Bent down?” asked Glad. “God, I don’t think I’ve so much as lifted a finger since that time I lifted a finger to obliterate that farm a couple of centuries ago for taking my name in vein. And that was a literal lifting of my right index, to be exact. I swept it across their entire four acres and they were gone!” To demonstrate, she, right there in front of Zev, slid her index finger through the air and accidentally sent all the paper clips into the air. Like second nature, Zev summoned all thumbtacks in the office to swoop in to the break room and impale every last airborne paper clip to the walls around them. In a split second, all the previously spilled clips were affixed to the walls, as neatly as they used to be messy. “Unhook those for me, would you?” Zev asked Glad as he left the room. “All one hundred?” she asked. “Yyyyyyyup,” answered Zev from down the hall and into the next millennium. (He liked to make his exits interdimensional.) Here’s the point: When the gods give you lemons, don’t make lemonade because you know you gotta cut down on that sugar. Let’s talk.

Our three teams tonight were: Robert & The Passengers, The Cutthroat 3 and The Queen Bees. In third place, with a score of 31 points was Robert & The Passengers. In second, with a score of 45 points was Queen Bees. And taking the night were the scurvy knaves called The Cutthroat 3 with 48 points. Come back to the Glendale Tap every Wednesday night at 7:30 for more King Trivia fun!

QUIZ RECAP

When Repellanteres, God Of Giant Bug Spray, went to Lake Star Slam to go camping with his family, he forgot to bring extra mayonnaise for the sandwiches. So he called Homaxides, God Of Errands, to maybe schlep some over. “Schlep?” asked Homaxides? “Since when do you speak Yiddish?” Repellanteres said: “I just recently picked it up. I heard Backsonia, Goddess of Quads and Pectoral Muscles, say: ‘Again with the schmutz!’ and I had to start using it. So be a mensch and get over here!” So Homaxides threw a million years worth of mayo into his night train and trekked over to Lake Star Slam and said: “Again with the mayo!” Then he waited for Repellanteres to invite him to stay and when he didn’t, Homaxides got back on his night train and said: “I love my work!”  Look, the point is this: There were no questions about mayonnaise on King Trivia night at the Glendale Tap and that’s gotta change!

The Drinking Round was a Beyoncé Off: Whoever could do the best Beyoncé would win drinks for their team. And I guess Beyoncé only has one song because everyone did “Single Ladies” over and over. The winner went to Awkward because their player did the most cardio. I mean, she was out of breath, c’mon.

In third place tonight was Bear Down with 58 points. In second was Awkward with 60 points. And taking the night was Queen Bees with 63 points! Huh…aaah. Going us every Wednesday at 7:30 at the Glendale Tap for more King Trivia fun!

QUIZ RECAP

When Metheles, God Of Pharmaceuticals, misplaced his stash (he could’ve sworn he hid it behind El Capitan; it wasn’t there), he racked his massive brain for where he may have put it. “I had four hundred million tons of Fun Gas cartridges, nine million tons of Lemon Shots, and two hundred million tons of Cheese and I can’t remember what I did with it!” He asked his mom Lucinda, Goddess Of Household Chores, “Mom, where’s my work?” (“Work” was a slang term for his stash that he only used around the police.) “Didn’t you bury it under those rocks at the bottom of Niagra Falls?” she asked. And sure enough, there everything was, a little soggy but still good stuff. He asked his mom to test some of it and she said: “Ooo, yeah! That’s good stuff!” The point is this: When you can hide your stash anywhere on Earth because you’re a god, write down on a post-it note where you hid it because gods have a lot on their plate.

The Drinking Round tonight was called “Do The Dew!” One person from each team came up and did a Mountain Dew commercial. Sweet Beans were not good at it, but they were adorable so they won and it’s always cool when the teams with only two people win free drinks!

In third place with 55 points was Robert & The Passengers. In second place with 64 pointswas Spotify Wrapped. And taking the night and having their way with it was Pizzadena with 75 points. Join us every Wednesday at 7:30 at the Glendale Tap!