The Glendale Tap
4227 San Fernando RdGlendale CA 91204
- PUB QUIZ—Wednesdays @ 7:30pm
The Glendale Tap
Glendale CA 91204
QUIZ RECAP
When Haulaneus, God Of Cross Country Trucking, pulled up at a rest area in the Outer Styx, he needed only one thing: new pine air fresheners. “I’m sick of these bacon ones I got,” he mumbled to himself. But when he rolled up to the register, the only scents they had were different flavors of bacon: streaky; American; chops, bits. He was sick of those. “I’m sick of these,” he said. “Do you have mint?” he asked the guy behind the register. “Mint bacon? Sure,” he said and threw Haul (to his friends) the newest in bacon-scented pine smells. “Why does everything have to be bacon?” yelled Haul. And only then did he realize the cashier was a pig. “You’re telling me!” the pig cashier said. Here’s the point: This totally happened tonight at the Glendale Tap on King Trivia night.
The Drinking Round was a game of Who Can Be A Horse? Post-Pink won it by being Mr. Ed. No one knew who Mr. Ed was but me.
In third place tonight was Dale! with 46 points. Taking second with 51 points was the aforementioned Post-Pink. And destroying the room with 60 was Nine Inch Ales. Come back next week (hopefully with all your fingers) for more King Trivia fun at The Glendale Tap!
| Game Rank | Team # | Team Name | Score | Teams Beaten | Team Beat Average |
| 1 | 80852 | Nine Inch Ales | 60 | 6 | 1.000 |
| 2 | 133034 | Post-Pink | 51 | 5 | 0.833 |
| 3 | Dale! | 46 | 4 | 0.667 | |
| 4 | Heisenburger | 36 | 3 | 0.500 | |
| 5 | 107470 | Points For Slytherin | 35 | 2 | 0.333 |
| 6 | the plan b’s | 25 | 1 | 0.167 | |
| 7 | Brewskis | 23 | 0 | 0.000 |
QUIZ RECAP
When Helmeteus, God Of Protective Head Gear, was sent head-first into The Brick Wall Of Farbingeus for the tenth time in front of the entire Assembly Of Clouds, he thought: “Well, certainly that’ll be the last one, right? Certainly they can’t wanna see more!” But Farbingeus stood up and said: “Sorry. One more time!” “You’ve gotta be kidding me! How many times does my helmeted heard have to hit your wall, man! It’s secure!” But Farb (to his friends) was unconvinced. “I had a surprise invasion of Gorgaxians last week that managed to get through my last wall. I need to know how sturdy this one is.” “But Gorgaxians fly,” reasoned Helmet (to his friends, “it wouldn’t matter how thick your wall is. They’ll just go over it.” With that, a silence fell on the assembly. Much like the silence that flooded through the Glendale Tap when several teams thought a bomb pop was really called an astro pop. Here’s the point: United Arab Emirates is not the same as Qatar. Let’s talk:
Tonight’s Drinking Round was a competition to see who could do the best impression of The Mountain That Rides from Game Of Thrones. I cant remember which team won, but it involved a man climbing onto the shoulders of a woman and yelling at the ceiling. (By the way: That will win you the Drinking Round every time.)
In third place tonight with a score of 51 points was Live! Laugh! Love! In second place with a score of 55 points was Robert And The Passengers. And taking the night from behind was County Roadies with a score of 58 points. They weren’t winning, and then they were winning. Come back next week for more King Trivia fun at the Glendale Tap!
| Game Rank | Team # | Team Name | Score | Teams Beaten | Team Beat Average |
| 1 | 137521 | Country Roadies | 58 | 6 | 1.000 |
| 2 | 113074 | Robert & The Passengers | 55 | 5 | 0.833 |
| 3 | Live Laugh Love! | 51 | 4 | 0.667 | |
| 4 | 81511 | Garbagetown | 37 | 3 | 0.500 |
| 5 | THAMP CAMP | 31 | 2 | 0.333 | |
| 6 | 137522 | The Big Three | 15 | 1 | 0.167 |
| 7 | Walter’s Krunkites | 13 | 0 | 0.000 |
QUIZ RECAP
When Waximus, God Of Candles, lit the three hundredth candle for the King’s Boat Parade, it was only then that he remembered: “Oh, that’s right! This is, like, a huge fire hazard! Why was I asked to do this?” The large barge he was on, loaded down with the three hundred candles, was not only in danger of catching fire but also of sinking into the Bottom Sound. “Just let it sink!” yelled a kid from the shore. “The water’ll put it out! And isn’t the King this parade’s for Poseidon anyway?” The kid was right, remembered Waximus, as he let the barge confidently sink below the water line, all its candles going out in fizzy snuffs, filling the water with black ashy clouds, filling Poseidan’s kingdom with watery darkness for generations to come. “This parade sucks,” Poseidon was rumored to have said. Here’s the point: This exact thing happened at the Glendale Tap on King Trivia night. Let’s talk:
Tonight’s Drinking Round was a Father’s Day Competition. One person from each team came up and did their best impressions of their dads. When In Ramen took it all when one of their members came up, looked at the room, and just walked out the door. Winner.
In third place tonight was Backdoor Bandits with 48 points. In second was When In Ramen with 57 points. And taking the night with 59 points was The Meg 2’s. Come back next week for more King Trivia fun at The Glendale Tap!
| Game Rank | Team # | Team Name | Score | Teams Beaten | Team Beat Average |
| 1 | The Meg 2s | 59 | 5 | 1.000 | |
| 2 | 131792 | When in Ramen | 57 | 4 | 0.800 |
| 3 | Backdoor Bandits | 48 | 3 | 0.600 | |
| 4 | Dirty Biscuits | 38 | 2 | 0.400 | |
| 5 | 136811 | VIP SECTION | 31 | 1 | 0.200 |
| 6 | BP | 28 | 0 | 0.000 |
